During some months, it can be almost impossible to make it without having to use a credit card to pay for groceries or bills.

With a credit card racking up fast, it can produce overwhelming feelings that make you want to scream and cry.

Providing for Your Children While Saving Money

One of the things you want for your children is to be able to provide for them. For this reason, it’s important to learn some new tricks to saving money as a single mother.

1. Use coupons from the newspaper and online and compare the ones you have with the sales flyer. Use your coupons to decide what you will make for meals the coming week. It will keep your meals different each week and you’ll save money by not buying groceries full price.
2.  Contact the local churches in the area about food banks. Many times, all you have to do is show proof of your income and you’ll receive a bag of groceries you can use for the week.
3.  Talk to social services about food stamps. If you have young children, you may be eligible for WIC as well. If you didn’t qualify at one time, don’t discount it now, especially if your income has changed.
4. Ask social services about assistance with heating and cooling bills. Many times, they have programs for low-income families to have their bill paid off in full.
5. Contact your electric company to ask if they have a budget plan for billing. This helps you budget better because they will charge you the same amount each month, which is the average amount you paid the year before. At the end of the year, if you spent less money on heating and cooling, you’ll receive money back. It’s a nice surprise!
6. For diapers, formula and other baby items, check the Internet for specials. Many websites will have specials in which you can receive these items at a reduced cost with free shipping. The website, Pricegrabber, is a good one to try to find the lowest prices for products.
7. Holidays can be expensive, especially birthdays and Christmas. Instead of waiting until the last minute when everything is overpriced, shop throughout the year and buy items your child want on sale or clearance.
8. Search clearance racks for clothes and buy sizes larger than what they wear now. That way, you buy clothes for much less money and have them ready for later, which may be a penny-pinching time.
9. Call your cable company, Internet provider, cell phone carrier and any other utility company you have to ask if there are any specials you are eligible for to reduce your monthly bill. Many times, they can come up with a plan that is much lower and still provides you with what you need.
10.  Call your credit card company to ask if they can reduce your interest rate. This will help you pay more on your principal so you can eventually pay it off or at least make your minimum payment affordable. Also, ask if they have a rewards card so you can make some money off what you charge.

As a single mother, you can probably come up with more tips on how to save money.

Please share your tips with other moms who come by this site for help.

When a couple with a child divorce, the first thing the parents think about is who will receive custody of the children.

It’s a heart breaking and anxiety-ridden experience to go through, especially when both parents are fit to have custody and both want it.

Types of Child Custody

There are eight types of custody:

• Alternating custody – The child lives an extended time with one parent and then another extended time with the other parent.
• Shared/Joint custody – Both parents have legal rights to the child and the child lives in one parent’s house as much as the other parent’s house.
• Sole custody – When only one parent has legal custody of the child.
• Split custody – When there is more than one child, on parent has custody over one child and the other parent has custody over the other.
• Third-party custody – When someone else, a third party, has custody of the child.
• Residential custody – The person with residential custody has the child live with him or her. It’s usually the same person with legal custody, but it can be used in joint custody cases.

How Custody is Determined

Each state has its own assessment to determine which parent can provide the best home to children of a divorce. Most of the time, the parents come to a decision before allowing the court to do so.

However, for parents who can’t come to a decision, the court will make one for them. In this case, the judge will decide what is in the best interest of the child and will sometimes ask the child for his or her thoughts.

How to Make the Best of Joint Custody

No one wants to share his or her children. It’s the only way though when you get a divorce and you are awarded joint custody.

The best thing to do is to keep in mind that you are as much the child’s parent as your ex is a parent. This will help you understand why you must be without your child sometimes.

When your child is away at his other parent’s house, stay as busy as possible. This will help the time go by quickly and keep your mind off thinking about how much you miss your child.

You can also plan activities for when your child comes home. This will get you excited about your child’s return, which will also make the time go by quickly.

Keep a list of things to do when your child is around that you wish you could do but can’t because you have your child.

When he or she is with the other parent, consult your list and you’ll be free to do those things. It’s as if you have a built-in babysitter and can get a break.

It’s a Situation to Get Used To

It’s not easy to have your child with you all the time to having him or her gone for days, but it’s not something you can’t get accustomed to.

While it may be difficult at first, after you get through the separation a few times, you’ll start to adjust and it will become a normal part of your new life.

It can be difficult to get back into the dating game as a single mother. You fear your heart will be broken again. You fear the person won’t be a good fit for your children or your children won’t like anyone.

These are all normal feelings to have as a single mother who is contemplating dating again.

But should you remain single forever? The answer is no.

How to Ease Back into Dating

Many single mothers believe they should just jump into dating, but that’s not the way to do it. Easing back in will prevent you from getting shocked, which will ultimately cause you to run back in your hole to hide.

The first thing you should do is ease back into the singles world. For example, the next time your friends ask you out for drinks, take them up on their offer.

Find a babysitter, and have a good time sitting with your friends. You’ll notice that many people your age are doing the exact same thing, which will help you start feeling comfortable.

As you do this more, you can start to muster up the courage to talk to other people. No, you aren’t trying to pick anyone up at this point. Simply be friendly and meet some new people – males and females. No one can have too many friends.

Again, as you get comfortable meeting people, you will most likely start to feel more confident in yourself and in meeting someone who will make you happy again.

If you don’t find anyone to date right away, that’s okay. All you are doing is meeting people and getting to know many different personalities.

Take It Slowly When It Comes to Dating

If someone asks for your phone number, you can choose to give it to him or not. It’s completely up to you. If you would rather not give him your number, simply say, “Well, I’m not really looking for a relationship at the moment but thank you anyway.”

If you do find someone you want to get to know better, take it just as slow as you did getting back into dating. Meet with the person for dinners, coffees, drinks or anywhere else you can have great conversation. This will help you figure out whether or not you want to continue developing the relationship or not.

If you and this person begin to like each other, and you believe he would be a good to your children and they would like him, you can start to think about introducing them.

Only do this when you are comfortable though. You don’t want to put too many demands on the relationship at first, because it could lead it in the wrong direction and end prematurely.

To introduce your new friend to your children, make it a fun occasion. Take your children out for pizza and have him come meet you there. That way, the focus isn’t entirely on him and who he is to mommy and them.

After the introduction, have a meeting with your children to ask them if they have any questions. Prepare yourself because some may be hard to answer. For example, “Is this my new daddy?”

Handle these types of questions as calmly as possible and with as much truth as possible. A good answer is, “No, your daddy could never be replaced, he is just mommy’s new friend and you may be seeing him more often so I wanted you to know who he is.”

Love Is Important – Don’t Deprive Yourself

Love is an important part of everyone’s life. Don’t deprive yourself of this very special feeling. You can find love again and you can do it as a single mother. Take your time, take care of yourself and children and you will all find the happiness of love again.

As a single mom, it’s often the little things that overwhelm us. One of those ‘little things’ is basic car maintenance.

Women make up approximately 3/4 of the automobile purchases in the nation, but only about half of these same women claim to know anything about simple car maintenance.

Your vehicle is one of your biggest investments and will cost the most to replace or repair. With that in mind, it’s time to learn about a little preventative maintenance.

If you follow these tips you can prolong the life of your vehicle and save yourself from being stranded with your little ones onboard.

Basic Car Maintenance – Finding a Mechanic

Your auto mechanic is just like your family doctor. You wouldn’t wait to find a family physician until your child is seriously ill, right?

Well, same thing goes for your automobile. If your alternator suddenly fails and you are left on the side of the road, –that’s not the time to look for a mechanic.

The best way to choose a mechanic is by word of mouth. Ask your friends, relatives, and especially people who you know are frugal with their money (and take good care of their vehicles).

If a person likes their mechanic, they will be more than happy to sing their praises. Once you have a few options written down, make a phone call to find out how much each shop charges for diagnostics. This is important for single moms who are often on a tight budget.

Some shops charge $80-$100 just to inform you what’s wrong with the vehicle. A fair price is about $25.

Basic Car Maintenance – Upkeep

• Regular Oil Changes – Once you have a reliable mechanic, plan out your upkeep. There are several things that will prolong the life of your vehicle. The most important of these is having an oil change every 3,000 to 5,000 miles. My automotive shop has weekly coupons that offer an oil change, filter change, check of all fluids, tire rotation, brake inspection, and battery test for just over $25. If your vehicle has high miles (over 100k) you’ll want to use higher performance oil.

• Maintain Fluids – If you aren’t sure how or where to check your fluids, break out your manual. There should be a diagram with all the fluids and the dipstick locations. Note: The dipstick is where the fluids are checked, but they are actually added in a different location. The fluids you’ll want to pay attention to and check regularly are power steering fluid, radiator coolant / antifreeze, brake fluid, washer fluid.

• Battery Connections – Keep an eye on your battery and look for signs of corrosion around the clamps. Water and baking soda can be used with an old toothbrush to scrub off any corrosion (or you can buy a battery brush). Before cleaning, always remove the battery cables. This is done by loosening the nut that holds each cable clamp. Once it’s loose, you can wiggle it upward until it comes off of the metal post.

• Tire Pressure – Regularly check the air pressure in your tires. You’ll need a tire gauge, which can be purchased at any auto parts store. Your owner’s manual will tell you the proper psi (pound per square inch) recommended for your tires. Keeping them all at the same level improves your gas mileage and provides you with a smoother ride, so this is important.

You’ll also want to check your tires for balding of the tread, nails, or tears. The last thing you want to deal with is a blow out while you are driving. This is not only dangerous, but can be pretty scary.

Besides these tips, you’ll also want to pay attention to noises, leaks, odors and warning lights on your vehicle. If you have a good mechanic that isn’t charging much for diagnostics you’ll be able to take it in whenever there’s a strange sound or warning light to find out what’s wrong.

Take care of your car and it will take care of you. I’ve seen cars go for 200k – 300k miles and the secret is always maintenance.

As a single mom, how are you doing with car care?

Do you take care of these things yourself or do you have a ‘family mechanic’ who helps you with your vehicle upkeep?

Being a mother along with all of the other responsibilities you have can be overwhelming and exhausting. You want to be the best mother to your children, but at the same time, you also need to hold down a career and take care of the house.

When you handle other business or you are just so tired you can hardly stand it, you may start to feel guilty.

My Story of Guilty Mother Syndrome

When I was a first time mother, I thought that everything came second to my daughter. I spent every waking moment with her, caring for her and playing with her. Everything else just fell to the wayside.

While the time I spent with her was special, I later found that I started to lose my identity. My house was a mess and had no time to myself. It depressed me. So, I started to implement those things into my life again. Of course, that led me to another problem, my feelings of guilt.

I couldn’t spend as much time with my daughter as I had before. Even though I felt much more balanced, my daughter would want me to be with her all the time. I couldn’t.

I had a life to live and I knew that I couldn’t go back. So, I knew I had to deal with the guilt.

How to Deal with the Guilt

Change Your Beliefs

I found that the guilt was mostly from my own beliefs about what children needed not what they truly needed. Children don’t need to have a parent with them all the time to entertain them. They need to learn to entertain themselves. Understanding this and reminding myself this made me feel a bit better about my guilt about having her play by herself sometimes.

For parents, who have children in daycare, you can change your beliefs about others caring for your children. Having someone else care for your children shows them that they can reach out for support to others and get it. This is a valuable lesson for life.

Understand Quality Comes Over Quantity

It’s important not to lose the importance of spending quality time with your children. I found that being able to release from her made the time we did spend together much more meaningful.

Remain Aware of Your Guilt

Usually, guilt comes from seeing something that doesn’t coincide with beliefs. When you change your beliefs to one that is less centered on your children, you will start to see your guilt will wean, however, there will be times when you will still feel guilty. This is your sign that you need to set up quality time with your children.

What Dealing with the Guilt Will Do for Your Children

It will be a great relief for you to see that you need to spend time with your children and then do it. You’ll feel as though you’re a good mother for giving your children time to themselves to develop independence and creativity, showing them that you have to work and have time to yourself through what you do while they are playing, and finally, show them that you are still available to them to give them the care and love they need.

Many people talk about all of the things that are unfair in their life. They will look at their life from the outside instead of stepping into their life to take action.

The Why Me Syndrome

My mother in law has lived her entire life talking about all of the bad things that have happened to her. She has become paralyzed by every unfortunate situation.

She continuously talks about what happened to her, instead of what she did about it. She is powerless in her own life. She doesn’t understand that her life is hers…what she believes is that outside factors control it.

This makes her depressed. Since she doesn’t think she ever does anything to bring on these unfortunate circumstances, she doesn’t feel she needs to do anything to fix them.

So, she just grumbles and then tries to make everyone else around her suffer as much as she is suffering.

Sound familiar?

Are you someone who just allows your life to control you and your happiness? If so, it’s time to turn that around.

How to Take Control of Your Life

Step #1. – Identify the Problem

You can’t fix something you don’t know is broken. So, the first thing is to become more aware of your situation. Think about what you don’t like about the situation you are in. Identifying the problems will help you start to understand what you can change and what you cannot.

Step #2. – Determine What You Can Change

As much control as you want over your situation, some things cannot be changed. This usually has to do with the actions of someone else. While you can’t control what other people do, you can control what you do in response to what they do to you.

Step #3. – Come Up with an Action Plan

Now that you know what you can change about your situation, you can start to think of what you are going to do about it. The first part of the process is to think of all the possibilities. Once you have all of the possibilities of what you can do about it, you can then devise actions step to follow through with that action.

Step #4. – Set a Time to Do It

Once you have your action plan, you need to set a time when you will implement it. Do not just tell yourself that you will get to it eventually, because you never will. Give yourself a date and stick to it.

Step #5. – Implement Your Plan

Once you approach the time you set, implement your action plan. You’ll notice that as you start to take action, you will start to feel more powerful. This is because you will begin to have control over your life.

You will start to feel as though you are making good things happen in your life because you are not just lying down and taking it any longer. You are standing up against outside forces from inside of your life instead of standing on the sidelines just watching yourself be beaten down.

Always Remain Aware and Manage Your Life

Managing your life means being aware of what is going on with it. Keep your eyes wide open and notice what you need to change about it. If you see something you don’t like about it, change it using the steps above.

If you like something in your life, do more of that. As you figure out what you like and don’t, you’ll start to shape your life according to what you desire. This is taking control of your life.

It will give you strength and it will make you much stronger to deal with unfortunate situations so you can get back to the life you love.

We’ve all seen it, and some of us have even taken part in it from time to time. But is it ever okay to speak negatively about your child’s father in front of them?

The short answer to this question is no.

As single mom’s, we may experience a myriad of feelings about our child’s father. We may be hurt, feel rejected, or we may be extremely angry.

Every time we pay a bill without help or feel overwhelmed caring for our child, we may be tempted to place blame on the other parent. This is a dangerous practice and can lead to numerous emotional problems for your child.

Whether our feelings are justified or not, there isn’t any excuse to ever expose children to unnecessary negativity.

What Happens When We Bash The Other Parent?

A lot of the effects depend on the age of your child, but none of it is good. According to psychologists, children don’t know where to place this kind of negativity.

They are innately attached to both parents, even in cases where the child has never met his or her father. When you speak ill of the other parent, the child often internalizes this and takes it as a blow to their own self esteem.

These internalized feelings can create insecurity, anxiety, low self esteem, confusion, and even anger.

Our children are not our peers, but sometimes as parents we treat them as if they can handle our comments and conversations. Children often won’t say anything in response to the negativity.

They’ll listen politely or even join in the conversation, but the negative words work as seeds and they will grow into some pretty unmanageable situations if you don’t watch what you say.

When my children were small, I have to admit, it was pretty difficult to refrain from talking trash about their dad. I was alone and it was difficult, both financially and emotionally.

Fortunately, I was part of a close knit church family who helped me through some of the rough spots. I’m not going to say I didn’t make mistakes with my words from time to time, but I will say that I regret the times I did.

Sneaky Negativity

There’s outright parent bashing and then there are things we can say that are just as hurtful, but they are cleverly disguised as comments or observations. I like to call this “sneaky negativity.”

Do you find yourself saying or doing any of the following?

• You’re just like your father. You get that from your father. (in a negative way, of course)

• Countering excitement or positive comments your child makes about their parent with your own comments like, “Yeah, but …” and finish it with negativity?

• Showing disapproval when your child receives a phone call or a gift from the other parent?

• Causing your child to feel guilty about their feelings toward their other parent.

As you can well imagine, these are extremely stressful and damaging behaviors. So, what do you do? Where do you turn?

Who Should You Talk To?

If you find life and single motherhood to be overwhelming, stop and find someone to talk to. If you don’t, you won’t be able to function as a parent the way you’d like to.

Who should you talk to?

Well, let’s start by talking about who you shouldn’t talk to. You may be tempted to call your sister or girlfriend, but is this going to be a positive experience, or just a huge, negativity fest?

You really don’t need someone to agree with you, –you need someone to listen but also guide you toward clearer thinking.

I would suggest talking to a counselor, your pastor, or even attending a single parent support group. Accepting your life for what it is and moving ahead in a positive manner with your children may seem rough or even impossible sometimes, but trust me, it will provide a solid foundation for your children’s future.

When they see you forging ahead regardless of the situation, they will grow to have that same tenacity and determination to succeed. Anyone can sit and wallow in the sadness of their situation. It takes real strength to move past the pain and anger to build a new life.

Can you tell us about your experience with “parent bashing”?

Have you ever slipped and engaged in it?

What is your current solution to guard against it?

As a single mom of college age children, it’s funny to look back at some of the worries of having latch-key kids. Just in case you’re not familiar with the term, latch-key kids are children who arrive home from school without adult supervision.

Generally, at least in my case, a mild to moderate amount of anxiety goes along with the decision to give children this level of responsibility. But, finances were tight, so we opted for the ‘self-babysitting’ method at quite an early age.

My three were ages 11, 9, and 7 when we first tried this out. Looking back, I’m happy about the choice I made. Although there were a few mishaps, injuries, and deviations from the rules along the way, they survived and are much more self-sufficient from the experience.

If you are considering the possibility of allowing your children to care for themselves until you arrive home from work, here’s some food for thought.

Is it Legal for Children to be Home Alone?

Don’t take any chances. The first thing I did was call my local Department of Children and Family Services to inquire about the legalities. Every state has their own specific rules, but for me the answer was tricky.

In the state of Florida it was up to the parent’s discretion whether the child was mature enough to care for themselves for a couple of hours. The clincher was this, — If any of my children was seriously injured while home alone, I could be charged with negligence.

With this in mind, I laid down some serious ground rules.

Setting the Rules

First of all, I didn’t feel my children were old enough to get off the school bus alone and into the house without assistance. What if one of them missed the bus? What if they were approached by a stranger? What if their key didn’t work?

In my mind, there were too many variables, so I decided to use my lunch hour to pick them up from school and take them safely to our home. Once I heard them lock the door behind me, I was pretty confident they could care for themselves for the next four hours.

My house rules were as follows:

• Do not cook anything. I provided fruit, vegetables, cheese, lunch meat, and other easy food to tide them over until dinner.

• Do not use knives or scissors.

• Do not open the door for anyone, period and do not “say” anything to the person knocking on the door. Obviously, you don’t want possible predators to hear a child say, “I’m sorry, my mom isn’t home and I’m not allowed to answer the door.” I tested this rule out many times by knocking on the door myself. My children never cracked, regardless of my persistence.

• Do not answer the phone. At the time, we had an answering machine. Once my children heard my voice on the machine it was “all clear” for one of them to pick up the phone.

• Do not go outside.

• Do not argue with each other.

• Do not play outdoor games inside the house or run around. These rules were instilled in my children long before they were ever left alone, so I felt pretty confident they wouldn’t break this one.

• Do not watch television. Sounds like a strict rule, but I didn’t want to raise little vegetables. My children used their time to complete the homework that they could, to draw, read, play board games with each other, straighten up their bedrooms, or play with their various toys.

• Call me if anything out of the ordinary occurs.

Besides these rules, of course, I provided emergency numbers and often spoke to them about safety. I wasn’t perfect and neither were they, but they successfully survived over four years of self-babysitting until I began to work from home.

Want to hear some of the horror stories?

Here’s a bullet point list of their misdeeds. Of course, I wasn’t aware of any of this at the time. The stories were relayed years later, once my children were confident they wouldn’t suffer any consequences.

What My Children REALLY Did:

For the most part, they really did abide by the rules.

Here’s the deviations provided as direct quotes from them to me:

• “A couple of times we put Holly’s mattress on the living room floor and used it as a trampoline.”

• “We made up this game where we blindfolded each other and played, ‘Guess what food this is,’ so we could trick each other into eating hot sauce.”

• “Faith slammed Holly’s finger in the bathroom door so hard one time that it was swollen and blue for a week.  She successfully hid her hand from sight until it looked normal.”

• “Keith used to eat the powdered chocolate Slim Fast.”

• “We watched MTV.”

That’s it? Yep, — that’s it.

At the time I would have been mortified about my children watching MTV and certainly upset about the rest. Looking back, I’d make the same decision again though. My children are all very responsible, caring, and quick thinking young adults.

How about you? Do you have a triumph or horror story associated with latch-key kids? Do you think children should be left with this type of responsibility?

Let’s hear from you.

In today’s world of surveillance cameras and Internet keylogger watchdogs, I would love to know what parents are up to.

Bullying has been brought up in the media a lot these days, especially with the new documentary that came out highlighting what happens to children who are being bullied.

Bullying happens to just about everyone at some point in their lives. Understanding what to do as a parent can greatly help your child through this traumatic situation.

My Story:

My daughter is in kindergarten and is already dealing with a bully. Her little friend will tell her that she doesn’t like her, doesn’t want to play with her and makes fun of just about anything.

However, the next thing you know, this same little bully friend will bring my daughter a bracelet or a little stuffed animal.

I ask my daughter why she continues to want to play with someone so mean and she says it’s because she is her best friend.

With experience in child and adolescent counseling, I know that it’s not best to forbid my daughter to play with her. She must learn what to do herself.

Tips for Knocking Out Bullies

No, knocking out doesn’t mean physically hurting someone. It means knocking them out of your child’s life.

Bullies target your child because they feel powerful when they do it. Take that power away and they don’t have a reason to do it anymore.

Here are some tips on how to do that:

#1: Keep the Lines of Communication Open

Your child needs to talk about what is going on with his bullying situation. Being able to talk about it will release the tension they feel from it.

If your child stops talking about it, it’s because he doesn’t feel comfortable anymore. This signals that they are internalizing it and that can lead to major emotional and mental issues. Keep an eye on this and seek professional help if you see this happen.

#2: Ask Questions About the Situation

Ask why your child hangs out with the person or has to be around the person. Asking questions gets your child thinking about how they may be contributing to the problem.

If your child has to be around the person involuntarily, it can help to ask questions like, “Is there anyway the teacher can move you away from this person?” “Can you sit at the front of the bus rather than the back?” “Do you need someone to pick you up from school?”

#3: Offer to Help, Listen and Respect

You always want to be available to help but you don’t want to jump in without warning because you might make the matter worse. Ask your child if he wants you to interject to try to do something with the situation, if he says no, respect that.

Now, this is only if your child is not in physical danger. If you find this person is being abusive to your child, it’s up to you to protect him the best way you know how.

#4: Read Books About Bullying

Sometimes children learn more about bullying if it comes from another source. Visit your library and check out books about bullies. The more your child knows the better.

#5: Ask for Bully Intervention in the School

You don’t have to call out your child, but you can call the school and suggest that a bullying presentation be made. By having assemblies about bullying and enforcing disciplinary action when bullying occurs can greatly reduce it from happening.

For more information, check out Committee for Children.

Kids have an amazing ability to listen to the things you don’t want them to hear and toning you out when you want them to hear you. There’s a time in every mother’s life when she says something that they don’t quite want their children to repeat, but they do anyway.

I’m guilty of this many times, but there are a few that I have to say made me smirk.

Here are some stories of my “Oh $h1t Moments.”

#1: You are killing me.

So sometimes my kids get under my skin, so much that I can’t help but exclaim, “You are killing me.” Well, one day as I was trying to get my daughter ready to head out to an appointment, she was being especially difficult. I picked her up, sat her on the couch to put her socks and shoes on as she swung her feet. All of sudden, I hear, “You are killing me.”

I couldn’t believe my ears so I said, “What did you say?”

“Mommy, you are killing me. Stop it.”

I said, “Where did you get that from?”

“From you mommy, you say it all the time.”

#2: Get out of my way, idiot.

Sometimes, in the car, I can’t control myself when I get stuck behind someone who is driving badly or excruciatingly slow.

One day, as I pushing my daughter in a stroller, we were in a crowd and she yells, “Get out my way, idiot!”

What do I say, “Oh my gosh, don’t say that! Where did you learn that?”

“You mommy, you say it in the car to the idiots.”

Oh boy…

#3: Shaft!

I had a friend in college who used the word ‘shaft’ whenever she felt something was unfair. I adopted that word and use it often. Since it has another connotation, it’s not exactly something I like to say when someone doesn’t know me.

As we are in Wendy’s one day for lunch, I announce they didn’t give me enough chicken in my salad. My daughter all of sudden exclaims, “SHAFT!”

I thought it was funny, not sure if the people sitting around us did though. Yikes…

#4: $h1t…$h1t…$h1t

I don’t swear often. Sometimes I get upset though and forget that I shouldn’t say $h1t.

One day, I was running late to an appointment and I had dropped an entire cup of milk on the floor. I didn’t have time to clean it up but I had to so I started saying, $h1t…$h1t…$h1t in frustration.

A couple days later, I picked up my son from the kid care facility at the gym and as we were leaving, he dropped his Diego backpack with his toys in it. All of sudden, I hear “$h1t…$h1t…$h1t.

The care lady didn’t find it humorous at all. Actually, she gave me a very disapproving look.

I had to laugh though as I was saying, “Don’t say that ever again.”

Of course, he says, “But mommy you said it!”

“Do as I say boy, not as I do.”

#5: My mommy doesn’t like you.

I forget my children are all ears when I speak to my friends. One day, I was talking to a close friend about someone I am not fond of.

My son heard me tell my friend, “I don’t like her at all.”

The next week, we are in the library and that particular person comes up to me. I am cordial, so I smile and say hello.

My son says, “My mommy doesn’t like you.”

You should have seen her eyes. It was funny but not at all what I wanted him to say.

Chime In – It’s Your Turn

What are your experiences of saying something that you didn’t want your children repeating?