You love your children, but being a single parent isn’t any walk in the park. You have to be mom and dad all the time. No break from it. You do it all and you do it all the time.
To get you through some of the most difficult days, you might need some secrets to single parenting to put in your toolbox. Check these out and get ready to use them at a moment’s notice.
Secret #1: Pick an identity for each situation.
While you may believe you have to be both mom and dad all the time, you don’t. In reality, you only have to be a mom or a dad each time.
Sometimes a situation will require you to be a mother and then in another situation you may have to bring out the dad in you. When you bring out the dad in you, put the mom away.
See when you don’t feel like you are being pulled in fifty directions by being both mom and dad, you won’t feel so stretched and exhausted. Pick one and stick with it each time something comes up.
Secret #2: You don’t have to be perfect.
Your job is nearly impossible, so as long as you are good enough at it, you are on the right path. You don’t have to do everything right all of the time.
You are only human and that makes you the kind and caring parent your children love. It also shows them they don’t have to perfect, which is a wonderful gift.
Secret #3: It’s okay to ask for help.
You probably have friends who have asked you if they can help you. You most likely have family who has said the same. Take them up on the offer sometimes because it’s okay to ask for help.
It never means you can’t be the awesome single parent you are. It means you have to take care of yourself to continue being the best you can be for your children
Secret #4: NO is love.
Many single parents feel a sense of guilt for not being the ideal dad to their children. When they feel guilty, they are more likely to tell their children they can do more or have more.
Letting them have everything and do anything they want won’t make you the dad you wish they had. It will only end up showing them that they can win you over on everything.
Saying NO shows them you are not a push over and you have as much strength as both a mom and dad. A mom and dad that loves them enough to show them that not having everything and doing it all will make them better people in life.
Secret #5: Forget about being a single parent.
It’s hard but you are doing it so forget the label and enjoy what you have, not what you don’t. Pick up your children, give them the love you have for them and remember the worth of being their everything.
They love you for everything you do for them even if they don’t always show it. This is your life and your life has loving children who depend on you – the person they love and trust to care for them.
Hold on to that and take control of it. You have the power to give your children everything they need and that has nothing to do with being a single parent – it has everything to do with being a parent.
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